A Letter for Lindsay

Dear Lindsay,

I'm so sorry to hear that you are headed to the slammer. Don't be sad, just think of it as summer camp! You will probably meet some friends who will teach you how to engrave new profanities on your finger nails. Also, the food will be so bad that you won't want to eat, and then you will finally have the body you've always wanted. Stay strong! You are like one of the coolest woman in Hollywood. Do you own pants? Or do you just like wearing big shirts? Just wondering cause it's so awesome!

Maybe to pass the time you can write a book. Here are some topics that you might want to consider:

1).I hate my father, I hate my mother, I can moderately tolerate my sister and I love myself!
2).Freckles
3).Officer, I AM FINE!

Bye for now and oh and when you make your grand entrance when you get done with your time, which will probably turn into 15 minutes cause the slimy lawyer that you're overpaying to represent you will strike some deal, make sure you look good, no crappy side braid like Paris Hilton, go for a Jersey Shore bouffant.


Respectfully,

Miss Barbie Kong!!!