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Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Microwave Re-Pause Man


Int.  An apartment
 
Kassie is watching ‘Shame'.  It's a lazy day and she 's not wearing a bra underneath her shirt. There is a knock at the door. She pauses the film.

Kassie
Come on in.

Roy
So you said on the phone that it was your microwave?

Kassie
Yeah, it’s the microwave. It just kinda stopped working.

Roy
Yeah, no problem.  I'll look at it.
 
Roy looks up and gets a glimpse atthe TV. Kerry Mulligan’s breasts are paused.

Kassie
Oh, yeah. I’m just watching a really good movie.  Have you seen it?
 

Roy is uncomfortable.

Roy
Okay, let me just work on this.
 
Roy works in silence. Kassie, remembering that she is not wearing a bra, covers herself.

Three days later.

Kassie is watching ‘American Psycho'’. It’s really hot so she’s wearing short shorts and a bikini top. There is a knock at the door. Kassie pauses the movie. Christian Bale’s naked, bloody body is paused.

Kassie
Hi Roy.
 
Roy
Kassie.
 
Roy notices Kassie’s outfit.

Kassie
It’s a scorcher out there today.

Roy.

Yup.

Roy cannot look directly look at Kassie. He then notices the TV.

Kassie
Oh, Ha! “American Psycho”. I’ve seen this one before but I forgot how good it is.

Roy
Ugghh. So how is the microwave?

Kassie
Working great.

Roy (distracted)
Is that blood?

Kassie
Yeah, this is right after he kills the prostitutes.

Roy
Whatever.

Kassie
Do you like movies?

Roy
No.

He looks at the floor.

Four Days Later.

Kassie is watching ‘Showgirls’. She’s just come out of the shower and is wearing a towel. There is a knock at the door. Kassie pauses the film. The pool scene is paused.

Kassie
Roy, I wasn’t expecting you today. Come in.

Roy is holding flowers, he notices Kassie’s towel.

Kassie
The microwave is great!
 
Roy notices the paused movie. He starts to sweat.

Roy
Will you go out with me?

Kassie
What? No. Roy, I’m married!

Roy
Movies and towels………..

Kassie
Oh, I’m sorry.  I’m talking a film class at NYU: America Raunch 204. It’s a great class but I can only watch the movies in the middle of the day. You must think I’m a total freak.

Roy
Umm……
 
Kassie
Ummm….
 
The movie unpauses and you hear Elizabeth Berkley moaning.

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