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Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Why don't you "like" me?


A group of friends are sitting around having some cocktails.

INT. A BAR
SALLY
Hey guys!

SUSAN
Uh-huh.

SALLY
Whoa, are you okay?

SUSAN
Yeah.

TRICIA
Just tell her.

SALLY
Tell me what?

TRICIA
She’s mad because you didn’t “like” her post about the flash mob today.

SUSAN
Tricia! No I’m not, I’m fine.

TRICIA
What? You called me in the middle of the day to complain about it.

SALLY
Are you serious, I was really busy at work today, and I had no time to “like” anything.

SUSAN
I’m not mad, it’s just that I like all of your stuff.

SALLY
What, you do? I seriously don’t really pay attention to stuff like that.

SUSAN
Whatever.

TRICIA
I “like” your stuff, Susan.

SUSAN
Yeah, I know.

SALLY
I’m a little disturbed that my value as a friend is measured in whether or not I “like” all the crap you put on Facebook.

SUSAN AND TRICIA
Crap!!!??!!

SALLY
You know what I mean.

SUSAN
I need to post stuff for my arts and crafts business.

SALLY
And I’m supportive of that, just because I don’t “like” your stuff, doesn’t mean I’m not excited for you.

TRICIA
No one “likes” the motivational quotes I put up there.

SUSAN AND SALLY
That’s cause they’re stupid.

TRICIA
Well, it’s better than all the stupid baby pictures you put up.

SUSAN
Hey, those are my kids.

TRICIA
I know, but I don’t need fourteen pictures centered around George eating peas.

SALLY
Okay, you guys let’s just change the subject, I support you and I love you.

TRICIA
Bullshit! Do you think I like “liking” things! I don’t. I just do it because I want people to like me because I was never loved as a child.

SALLY
Ugghhhh.

Tricia and Susan look at their phones angrily.

TRICIA
Oh, I have 44 “likes” on my head band picture.

Her mood change immediately, and she now has a big smile on her face.

SUSAN
And I got 36 “likes” on the picture of Grace pooping.

Sally takes out her phone and deletes her Facebook account.

End.

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